Memorys we want to forget
by AlysanyeEbony
Summary: Everyone knows how bad of a childhood Tony has had, so when Pepper finds out she's pregnant how will Tony react? What if he looses the baby?


Work Text:

Tony leaned his head against the hard, dark brown wood. He was curled up sitting in the fetal position underneath the home bar. Clutching the whiskey bottle in his right hand he lifted the muzzle to his lips and took a large swig of the cheap alcohol. Savoring the burn that you don't get from the expensive stuff he rested his head against his knees. He pulled in a few shaky breaths trying to keep the tears that were always threatening from behind his eyelids from falling. He was fighting a loosing battle. The tears finally broke and Tony sobbed.

_Tony woke up that morning to sunlight, an empty bed and sounds of retching coming from the bathroom. Getting up from the soft, warm bed he made his way over to the overly large bathroom. He was greeted by the sight of Pepper, beautiful Pepper, kneeling on the floor with her head in the bowl of the toilet. Walking over to her side, he kneeled next to her, rubbing soothing circles on her back._

Pushing up from the toilet she leaned back into Tonys chest, his arms coming up to circle around her automatically. They sat like that for a few moments, just enjoying the comfort.

Sighing, Pepper untangled herself from Tony and going over to the sink. "I need to go in early today" Tony opened his mouth to object but Pepper cut him off before he could get a word in "and before you say anything, yes it's necessary." Tony sighed and got up from the floor, wrapping his arms around the redheads waist. "Nothing I say will convince you otherwise. Will it?" Pepper just smirked and gave him a kiss.

In truth, he should have seen what was going on, he was a genius for gods sake! There were signs everywhere. He took another burning swig of the whiskey, the bottom of the bottle tapping against the shelf above him.

_Tony landed on the landing pad with a dull metallic clang. The spinning rims circled around him taking the armor piece by piece. He had come back from a day of Avenging leaving him tired and aching and annoyed. The villain of the day was a group of boys that called themselves the Flying Flippers. They really needed to stop letting the villains name themselves. The group generated more headaches and were generally more annoying than anything else. He was making for the coffee machine when He saw Pepper standing in the doorway "Hey Pep! I thought you would be working over." Looking up from his precious, precious coffee he noticed her blank look directed at the floor "Hey, what's wrong? Is everything alright?" He took her face in his hands, only then did she look at him. Slowly she moved to hand him something. Looking down his heart stopped. It was a pregnancy test. It was a _positive _pregnancy test. _

Tightening his fingers, he looked down at the thin piece of plastic in his hand. A new batch of tears flowing freely down his face. "Tony?" A voice called softly "Tony? Oh, Tony." A petite hand cupped his cheek as Pepper brought his head to rest in the crook of her neck. One hand stroking through his hair, the other wrapped around his back. One of Tonys hands unconsciously rested on her stomach.

"I'm so sorry for what I said. I didn't mean it, I'm just..." Pepper paused "It was no excuse"

"I understand. It's my fault. If I had been able to protect you... If I wasn't Iron Man then none of this would have happened! We wouldn't have nearly been blown up. You wouldn't have been kidnapped. We wouldn't have... have..." Tony choked. With the hand that had been stroking his hair Pepper gently pulled Tonys head up to meet her eyes "Tony, now I want you to listen very carefully. It's not your fault." When he tried to interrupt Pepper cut him off " No! It's not your fault and I don't blame you one bit."

Tony looked at Pepper in dismay. "But don't you see? It is my fault! It's always my fault! I screw everything up! Everything I touch I turn to ash! I would have screwed up our kid too!...I already did." Those last words were so quiet Pepper almost missed them.

"Don't you dare." Pepper growled "Don't you dare say that, Tony Stark."

They sat there, underneath the bar, till the sun came up the next morning, and there they still sat. In each others company.


End file.
